Small but Important Steps to Your Live and Learn Mindset
Yes, you are an incredible and amazing woman!
Yes, you work really hard to take care of those around you and to grow in your career and business.
But, if you’re like me, then not everyday do you feel your best. Not everyday do you feel like the rock, solid all-star that you are.
There may be days when discouragement sets in because things didn’t go as you hoped at work or your business isn’t growing as fast as you would like. It could be that you are beating yourself up about how you handled a situation with your son or daughter. Perhaps none of these things have happened to you; nevertheless you still find yourself feeling just blah.
Not feeling your best is the worst, and it can lead to more days of not feeling your best. The last thing that I would want for anyone woman is to develop a fixed mindset with this feeling. That kind of fixed mindset can easily sneak up on you; and before you recognize it you have gotten used to feeling this way and just accept it as how you’re supposed to feel.
But remember there is always something that you can do to be better. Keep your live and learn mindset.
The good news is that you don’t have to stay in this state or funk. There are ways to give yourself a pick me up. There are simple things that you can do to get you on your way from this fixed place.
5 Things You Can Do Today
Now before you stop reading because I said the thing that makes you feel guilty, let me explain. As a former athlete I know how good exercise can make me feel both psychologically and physiologically. I love how good I feel when I can take all the stairs out of the subway and not breathe hard or how it makes me feel when I look at photos and see my defined Michelle Obama arms.
Nevertheless, I still fight with myself about exercising. I’m on again off again. There are periods when I workout consistently 4 times a week for months, and then life happens. I don’t have time (or don’t make the time) to exercise. Once this happens too frequently, I stop altogether and go months without exercising.
Needless to say it’s a vicious cycle. However, I don’t stay in the fixed place of not exercising. Every time, I start over and rebuild the habit.
Why do I do this?
Because exercising makes me feel better. The times when I am feeling at my lowest that’s when I pull myself up and find the will to workout.
Exercising releases BDNF (brain-derived neurotrophic factor) proteins which are essentially mood enhancers. They help repair and protect our memory neurons, which is why you may feel like your mind has been rebooted after exercising.
Endorphins are also released while exercising. They don’t call those the happy hormones for nothing. They act as blockers to any unease or pain that you may be feeling.
I’m spending the most time on this tip because not only will exercise help you to feel good, but it is also good for you. You don’t have to work out for an hour to experience these benefits. In fact, when you first start out you don’t need to do more than 5-10 minutes a day to reap all of the feel good benefits of the BDNF and endorphins.
I have curated a 7-minute workout playlist that I use whenever I’m starting over again, because the exercise routines are just seven minutes. You’re not making a big commitment for hours. It’s just seven minutes. The first time through is always the hardest, but the post-workout glow is also the greatest.
The videos on the playlist are by Lucy Wyndham Read. I find them easy to do and actually see results.
Checkout the playlist
2. Wear your favorite dress or skirt
You may be wondering why this tip isn’t just wear your favorite outfit, and it’s a valid query. The reason for the specificity of the clothing item is because of the allure of the right fitting skirt or dress.
There is a reason there are thousands of Pinterest boards dedicated to the LBD (little black dress) or the ever popular stunning red dress. It doesn’t matter your shape or size, there is always a dress that will make you feel beautiful.
Once you have identified what kind of dress is most flattering for your body type, you can do no wrong in that dress. I personally prefer the fit and flare style.
The same can be said for skirts. Skirts just like dresses have numerous styles and lengths, but once you slide right into your perfect one you instantly feel good. Whether someone does or doesn’t tell you, you know you look good, which in turn makes you feel good.
3. Get your hair done
Sure getting a mani or pedi can make you feel good, but they don’t hold up to that feeling that you get when you leave the salon after getting your hair styled.
At the salon your hair is more than just washed. You also get a scalp massage at the sink, which always feels like it’s never long enough. If you’re lucky you get to leave the kids at home, and the 1-2 hours is time to yourself.
Looking in the mirror after your new haircut or fresh hairstyle can instantly lift your spirits. You feel like a different person, because you look different. Your confidence receives the equivalence of an energy drink, and you feel good.
If you find yourself struggling with your natural hair, the salon isn’t always going to be the answer, but for this particular day it can do the trick. For the other days I’m always here to help, as I offer natural hair consultations and regimen building coaching.
Check out my post on Why You’re Thinking About Your Naturally Curly, Coily or Kinky Hair All Wrong
4. Drink more water
Hopefully, we all know that water is good for us, but how much do we internalize about the benefits of water?
Water helps to fight fatigue by providing energy to our systems, consequently you will be more focused and feel more alert. It prevents dehydration, and dehydration can affect your mood.
It is so easy to become dehydrated since our bodies are constantly perspiring even if we are just sitting still. Your body is always campaigning to regulate your internal temperature. It does this with perspiration, which is the cooling process of the body and by which we lose our water.
There are weight loss benefits to drinking water, as well as benefits of drinking water for your hair and skin. Water helps to keep both your skin and hair moisturized, which helps with length retention for your hair and elasticity for your skin to shoo away wrinkles.
Water also aids in a healthy immune system. Doctors recommend that we drink more water during the cold and flu season because of the effects of water on the immune system.
Here is a great article on 14 overlooked benefits of drinking water.
All in all you will be in a better mood when you drink enough water because your bodily systems will be running better.
5. Accomplish something that’s on your to do list
The rush that comes with achieving something is unlike any other. You know that mental (or even literal) list of things to do that is always plaguing you. The one that makes you feel down on yourself because you don’t really check them off as completed.
Take one item on that list, activate yourself and do it. If you allow yourself you will get into a psychological state that is referred to as flow.
Psychologist, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, who created the concept of flow, described it as "being completely involved in an activity for its own sake. The ego falls away. Time flies. Every action, movement, and thought follows inevitably from the previous one, like playing jazz. Your whole being is involved, and you're using your skills to the utmost."
Getting into flow while working on one of the tasks on your list will inevitably contribute to your sense of accomplishment whether you actually completed the entire task or not. The feeling of accomplishment is one of the most genuine feel good feelings that you can offer yourself.
Who knows; maybe one of the tasks that you set out to check off is one of the other four tips on this list such as begin exercising or take better care of yourself. Either way achieving the state of flow where all other needs, distractions or excuses fade away is more than enough reason to activate yourself to begin to achieve.
You may be thinking that sounds all well and good, but…
Before you finish that sentence, I will just ask you to stop to think about the goal. The goal is something that you can do TODAY to feel good, to feel better about yourself.
Perhaps a reason why you’re in a funk or feeling discouraged is because you know there are things you need to do and should be doing. I have been there. The truth is the more I put these things off the worse I begin to feel.
The key is to activate. Meaning begin. Start. Try. Do.
So here are 5 simple things you can do today. Each of these things can help you feel good, but, really, each of these things will help move you from a fixed place to a place of growth. After all having a live and learn mindset is what will help each of us on our journeys to feel good, look good and eat good!
That’s Cynthia’s mindset on 5 simple things you can do today to feel good about yourself.
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I'm passionate about learning and helping our kids foster a learner's mindset. Empowering you with the resources you need is my goal. It's all about learning here!